伯樂，原來是夢。
我很痛，
壓抑。
。。。。。。。。。。。。。
發現，我沒有真正的伯樂。
很辛苦，
我告訴自己不要放棄。
不要放棄。
告訴自己要改變，
結果還是很辛苦。
伯樂，呢？
2013年3月3日星期日
2012年11月10日星期六
面具的倒影
近期看了很多人的近況，生活點滴。
有羡慕，有感慨，甚至有時是妒忌。
發覺自己到底是怎麼了。
其實我真的很害怕.....有人說我想他多。
但是有些東西就是無法述說，真的很煎熬。
很想說給知音人聽，但是又哪裡有那麼容易啊。
世界存在了很多一生下來就是奠定的不公平，
有人說只要你奮鬥就會有成果，但是實實在在有些東西無論如何，還是依舊不變。
在想，有一天，自己的故事是如何呢？是喜劇還是悲劇。
都不敢想，每次想還是會....
淚光閃爍，有有誰會救你？
最後還是自己，其實自己都不懂如何去救。
我相信很多人都和我面對同樣的問題，
他們也是面對這打不開的死結，
我真的很好奇他們會如何解決這死結。
累了，真的，有時閉起眼，就是累，也就是淚。
有羡慕，有感慨，甚至有時是妒忌。
發覺自己到底是怎麼了。
其實我真的很害怕.....有人說我想他多。
但是有些東西就是無法述說，真的很煎熬。
很想說給知音人聽，但是又哪裡有那麼容易啊。
世界存在了很多一生下來就是奠定的不公平，
有人說只要你奮鬥就會有成果，但是實實在在有些東西無論如何，還是依舊不變。
在想，有一天，自己的故事是如何呢？是喜劇還是悲劇。
都不敢想，每次想還是會....
淚光閃爍，有有誰會救你？
最後還是自己，其實自己都不懂如何去救。
我相信很多人都和我面對同樣的問題，
他們也是面對這打不開的死結，
我真的很好奇他們會如何解決這死結。
累了，真的，有時閉起眼，就是累，也就是淚。
2012年3月19日星期一
2012年3月2日星期五
放不下
每次在入睡前都會在回想很多的問題，事物，
或種種根本不想去想的煩惱.....
很久都沒有寫blog了，看回上一篇的blog文，
原來已經是7個月的事了，其實每次想寫時最後也放棄沒寫了。
今天，寫起此文，其實也覺得是為很多很多問題做了一個簡單的總結。
然後的出來的結論就是.....放不下。
當然，每個人的生存也就牽連了很多的問題和障礙。
有時嘗試叫自己放下一些不是大問題的問題，
但是盡管過去了很久，也一直告訴自己放下，就可以繼續往前了。
又談何容易，每次叫自己放下的前一刻，後一刻又再想了，又在執著了....
今年2012，一個人生又在有新的轉折點一次，有時自己很害怕，
害怕面對很多未知的未來，告別了這4年前從悲痛到慢慢適應，到能夠適應與成長的過程，
2012年，也就很快告別這穩定的08-11階段，也就是說全新的東西很快就來.....
面對很多很多的未知未來，還真的不敢想，也同時的，放不下這幾年來的過程。
有人說，一個人有起伏才是充實的人生過程，但是渺小的自己又還真的能夠編織自己的那段故事？
很抽象的一大堆文, 也許就是無法闡述自己完全的一面問題，
只能希望就是未來的路能夠活得比想像好就很滿足了。
有時覺得自己很介意別人如何看自己，如何評價自己，也有時候覺得自己就像曹操缺點的背影，
爲什麽就沒有曹操那善用兵法等等的優點，卻只有一份強烈疑心的缺點....
或許經歷了很多的放不下，人也變得猜疑心中，其實活得真的不快樂，
只因自己放不下。
有人告訴我說，你真的要改變，我也接納改變，
但是還真的放不下。
改變........................放不下.......
或種種根本不想去想的煩惱.....
很久都沒有寫blog了，看回上一篇的blog文，
原來已經是7個月的事了，其實每次想寫時最後也放棄沒寫了。
今天，寫起此文，其實也覺得是為很多很多問題做了一個簡單的總結。
然後的出來的結論就是.....放不下。
當然，每個人的生存也就牽連了很多的問題和障礙。
有時嘗試叫自己放下一些不是大問題的問題，
但是盡管過去了很久，也一直告訴自己放下，就可以繼續往前了。
又談何容易，每次叫自己放下的前一刻，後一刻又再想了，又在執著了....
今年2012，一個人生又在有新的轉折點一次，有時自己很害怕，
害怕面對很多未知的未來，告別了這4年前從悲痛到慢慢適應，到能夠適應與成長的過程，
2012年，也就很快告別這穩定的08-11階段，也就是說全新的東西很快就來.....
面對很多很多的未知未來，還真的不敢想，也同時的，放不下這幾年來的過程。
有人說，一個人有起伏才是充實的人生過程，但是渺小的自己又還真的能夠編織自己的那段故事？
很抽象的一大堆文, 也許就是無法闡述自己完全的一面問題，
只能希望就是未來的路能夠活得比想像好就很滿足了。
有時覺得自己很介意別人如何看自己，如何評價自己，也有時候覺得自己就像曹操缺點的背影，
爲什麽就沒有曹操那善用兵法等等的優點，卻只有一份強烈疑心的缺點....
或許經歷了很多的放不下，人也變得猜疑心中，其實活得真的不快樂，
只因自己放不下。
有人告訴我說，你真的要改變，我也接納改變，
但是還真的放不下。
改變........................放不下.......
2011年7月6日星期三
2011年6月24日星期五
2011年6月11日星期六
DSM3 research after the National Museum trip~
After the national museum trip, i was learn a lot of malaysia history and development process. A lot of interesting history we can research more and develop more. according to the malaysia history, i found that zhen he ( from chinese ming dynasty) 7 times come to sound east asia history is very interesting, so i was reaseach and find more on this topic. here is my basic research.
this is english version:
[Zheng He]
Zheng He, originally named Ma He, was born into a Muslim family just beyond the borders of China (later Yunnan Province in the southwestern part of China) in 1371. His ancestors were the Arabian immigrated into China during the Tang and Song dynasties (618-1279). When he was still young the Ming Dynasty (1368-1644) conquered his province in 1378, and he was taken to the imperial Chinese capital to serve as a court eunuch.
However, he distinguished himself by helping Zhu Yuanzhang defeat the Yuan Dynasty, and was rewarded with an official post in the government. During the coup started by Zhu Di, who was the fourth son of the first emperor Zhu Yuanzhang of the Ming Dynasty and later became Emperor Chengzu, Zheng He helped Zhu Di gain the throne and was given command of the Chinese navy. Hence he wielded great influence in court.
In 1402, after Emperor Cheng Zu of the Ming Dynasty (1368-1644) ascended the throne, he dispatched Zheng He and Wang Jinghong to lead a giant fleet to the Western Sea (today's Southeast Asia), carrying members of soldiers and large quantity of goods.
The fleet reached the countries of Southeast Asia, east Africa and Arabia, initiating a feat in the history of navigation and regarded as an unprecedented great historical period in Chinese history of trade and cultural exchanges.
From 1405 to 1433, Zheng He led his fleet to voyage to the Western Sea for seven times. The number of ships of his fleet was from 40 to 63 each time, taking many soldiers and sailors on the voyage, with a total party over 27,000 people. Their ships navigated the wide sea area from Ryukyu Islands, the Philippine Islands and Maluku Sea to the Mozambican Channel and the costal areas of South Africa, developing mutual trade, exchanging culture and technologies, communicating traffic on the sea and promoting social and economic development in such countries and areas.
The mighty fleet voyaged on the Indian Ocean, not only astonishing the Arabian navigators, but also amazing the Venice businessmen coming and going between Hormuz and Aden, hence providing a new enlightenment to the European navigation. Zheng He's voyages are 87 years earlier than that of Columbus, 93 years earlier than that of Gama, and 116 years earlier than that of Magellan.
Chinese treasure ships carried a great deal of special Chinese products to foreign countries. As to craftwork, there were brocade, gauze, and skein; as to china, there were newly developed celadon, Xiulihong, as well as the enamelware with Chinese characteristics. By the way, during the Tang Dynasty Chinese people had grasped the technology of sintering glass, but only after Zheng He's voyage, Chinese had grasped the technology of adding borax in glass to resist heat. The Arabian glass artisan came to China with Zheng He's fleet and imparted the new technology to sinter new kinds of glass vessel resistant to sudden changes of temperature. Since then, this kind of glass was produced in large quantities in China and became a common utensil.
Zheng He also brought back building materials, fuels and exotic articles. It was at this time that the so-called kylin and Fulu (African giraffe and zebra) became decorative animals for the Chinese imperial garden.
After coming back, Zheng He's subordinates wrote the books as Travel Notes of Foreign Countries, Chorography of Western Countries, etc., introducing the geographic and natural conditions, local customs, as well as production and living of those foreign countries and regions, widening Chinese people's vision and enlarging their knowledge on foreign countries.
Zheng He's expedition was half a century earlier than those of the European navigators. Zheng He died in 1435 at the age of 65. After Zheng He's last voyage no further voyages were launched.
this is chinese version:
1405年7月11日﹙明永乐三年﹚明成祖命郑和率领二百四十多艘海船、二万七千四百名士兵和船员组成的远航船队，访问了许多个在西太平洋和印度洋的国家和地区，加深了中国同东南亚、东非的联系。每次都由苏州刘家港出发，一直到1433年﹙明宣德8年﹚，他一共远航了有七次。最后一次，宣德八年四月回程到古里时，在船上因劳累过度过逝。民间故事《三保太监西洋记通俗演义》将他的旅行探险称之为三保太监下西洋。
郑和曾到达过爪哇、苏门答腊、苏禄、彭亨、真腊、古里、暹罗、阿丹、天方（阿拉伯国家）、左法尔、忽鲁谟斯、木骨都束等三十多个国家，最远曾达非洲东海岸，红海、麦加（伊斯兰教圣地），并有可能到过今天的澳大利亚。
下‘西洋’的定义：明朝初期以婆罗（Borneo）/文莱为界，以东称为东洋，以西称为西洋，故过去所称南海、西南海之处，明朝称为东洋、西洋，且暹罗湾之东海，称为涨海。
从1405年到1433年，从刘家港出发，最远到达非洲东海岸和红海沿岸
郑和下西洋的条件和前提：
1.中国唐宋元朝以来领先世界的先进的航海技术和发达的造船技术；
2.永乐帝朱棣宣扬大国国威，出于政治目的的需要。
3.中国的元朝的远洋贸易传统，元朝时中国的远洋贸易非常发达[1]，[2]拥有当时世界上贸易量最大的几个港口和世界上最强大的海军和大量的民船和商船，为后来的明朝航海奠定了基础。
4.明朝的封建中央集权制度能够调动力量办大事[3]，能提供经济上的支持和军事力量保障；
5.郑和船队上的海员、明朝军队士兵、翻译官等人的共同努力。
郑和是世界历史上的伟大航海家。英国前海军军官、海洋历史学家孟席斯（Gavin Menzies）出版了《1421年中国发现世界》 ，认为郑和船队先于哥伦布发现美洲大陆澳洲等地。1405年之后的28年间，郑和七次奉旨率船队远航西洋，航线从西太平洋穿越印度洋，直达西亚和非洲东岸，途经30多个国家和地区。他的航行比哥伦布发现美洲大陆早87年，比达伽玛早92年，比麦哲伦早114年。在世界航海史上，他被开辟了贯通太平洋西部与印度洋等大洋的直达航线。600年前，从1405年开始，在28年间，郑和率领中国大明皇朝的200多艘船航行在世界海域上，造访各国。据英国著名历史学家-哈佛大学的李约瑟博士估计，1420年间中国明朝拥有的全部船舶，应不少于3800艘，超过当时欧洲船只的总和。今天的西方学者专家们也承认，对于当时的世界各国来说，郑和所率领的舰队，从规模到实力，都是无可比拟的。
郑和下西洋的目的：
主要是宣扬明朝国威，还有一说法是，明成祖为了寻找可能流亡海外的建文帝（军事目的）；
郑和下西洋的意义：
1.展示了明朝前期中国国力的强盛，中国的海军纵横大洋，虽然在国土面积上远远比元朝小，但至少实现了万国朝贡，盛世追迹汉唐；
2.加强了中国明朝政府与海外各国的联系，散财之举给南洋，西洋各国带来了经济实惠；
3.这是中国古代历史上最后一件世界性的盛举，从此，郑和之后，再无郑和。
4.由于郑和下西洋的政治目的大于经济目的，没有发动民间的商业贸易，全部的开支都依赖明朝强大的国力来支撑，没有对中国带来什么经济实惠，于是，明朝全盛时期过后，再也没有雄厚的经济实力来支持这项庞大的工程了，下西洋随之停止。
there are more and more history part can to do research, and also can learn that what is the influnce when zhen he come to malaya.
this is english version:
[Zheng He]
Zheng He, originally named Ma He, was born into a Muslim family just beyond the borders of China (later Yunnan Province in the southwestern part of China) in 1371. His ancestors were the Arabian immigrated into China during the Tang and Song dynasties (618-1279). When he was still young the Ming Dynasty (1368-1644) conquered his province in 1378, and he was taken to the imperial Chinese capital to serve as a court eunuch.
However, he distinguished himself by helping Zhu Yuanzhang defeat the Yuan Dynasty, and was rewarded with an official post in the government. During the coup started by Zhu Di, who was the fourth son of the first emperor Zhu Yuanzhang of the Ming Dynasty and later became Emperor Chengzu, Zheng He helped Zhu Di gain the throne and was given command of the Chinese navy. Hence he wielded great influence in court.
In 1402, after Emperor Cheng Zu of the Ming Dynasty (1368-1644) ascended the throne, he dispatched Zheng He and Wang Jinghong to lead a giant fleet to the Western Sea (today's Southeast Asia), carrying members of soldiers and large quantity of goods.
The fleet reached the countries of Southeast Asia, east Africa and Arabia, initiating a feat in the history of navigation and regarded as an unprecedented great historical period in Chinese history of trade and cultural exchanges.
From 1405 to 1433, Zheng He led his fleet to voyage to the Western Sea for seven times. The number of ships of his fleet was from 40 to 63 each time, taking many soldiers and sailors on the voyage, with a total party over 27,000 people. Their ships navigated the wide sea area from Ryukyu Islands, the Philippine Islands and Maluku Sea to the Mozambican Channel and the costal areas of South Africa, developing mutual trade, exchanging culture and technologies, communicating traffic on the sea and promoting social and economic development in such countries and areas.
The mighty fleet voyaged on the Indian Ocean, not only astonishing the Arabian navigators, but also amazing the Venice businessmen coming and going between Hormuz and Aden, hence providing a new enlightenment to the European navigation. Zheng He's voyages are 87 years earlier than that of Columbus, 93 years earlier than that of Gama, and 116 years earlier than that of Magellan.
Chinese treasure ships carried a great deal of special Chinese products to foreign countries. As to craftwork, there were brocade, gauze, and skein; as to china, there were newly developed celadon, Xiulihong, as well as the enamelware with Chinese characteristics. By the way, during the Tang Dynasty Chinese people had grasped the technology of sintering glass, but only after Zheng He's voyage, Chinese had grasped the technology of adding borax in glass to resist heat. The Arabian glass artisan came to China with Zheng He's fleet and imparted the new technology to sinter new kinds of glass vessel resistant to sudden changes of temperature. Since then, this kind of glass was produced in large quantities in China and became a common utensil.
Zheng He also brought back building materials, fuels and exotic articles. It was at this time that the so-called kylin and Fulu (African giraffe and zebra) became decorative animals for the Chinese imperial garden.
After coming back, Zheng He's subordinates wrote the books as Travel Notes of Foreign Countries, Chorography of Western Countries, etc., introducing the geographic and natural conditions, local customs, as well as production and living of those foreign countries and regions, widening Chinese people's vision and enlarging their knowledge on foreign countries.
Zheng He's expedition was half a century earlier than those of the European navigators. Zheng He died in 1435 at the age of 65. After Zheng He's last voyage no further voyages were launched.
this is chinese version:
1405年7月11日﹙明永乐三年﹚明成祖命郑和率领二百四十多艘海船、二万七千四百名士兵和船员组成的远航船队，访问了许多个在西太平洋和印度洋的国家和地区，加深了中国同东南亚、东非的联系。每次都由苏州刘家港出发，一直到1433年﹙明宣德8年﹚，他一共远航了有七次。最后一次，宣德八年四月回程到古里时，在船上因劳累过度过逝。民间故事《三保太监西洋记通俗演义》将他的旅行探险称之为三保太监下西洋。
郑和曾到达过爪哇、苏门答腊、苏禄、彭亨、真腊、古里、暹罗、阿丹、天方（阿拉伯国家）、左法尔、忽鲁谟斯、木骨都束等三十多个国家，最远曾达非洲东海岸，红海、麦加（伊斯兰教圣地），并有可能到过今天的澳大利亚。
下‘西洋’的定义：明朝初期以婆罗（Borneo）/文莱为界，以东称为东洋，以西称为西洋，故过去所称南海、西南海之处，明朝称为东洋、西洋，且暹罗湾之东海，称为涨海。
从1405年到1433年，从刘家港出发，最远到达非洲东海岸和红海沿岸
郑和下西洋的条件和前提：
1.中国唐宋元朝以来领先世界的先进的航海技术和发达的造船技术；
2.永乐帝朱棣宣扬大国国威，出于政治目的的需要。
3.中国的元朝的远洋贸易传统，元朝时中国的远洋贸易非常发达[1]，[2]拥有当时世界上贸易量最大的几个港口和世界上最强大的海军和大量的民船和商船，为后来的明朝航海奠定了基础。
4.明朝的封建中央集权制度能够调动力量办大事[3]，能提供经济上的支持和军事力量保障；
5.郑和船队上的海员、明朝军队士兵、翻译官等人的共同努力。
郑和是世界历史上的伟大航海家。英国前海军军官、海洋历史学家孟席斯（Gavin Menzies）出版了《1421年中国发现世界》 ，认为郑和船队先于哥伦布发现美洲大陆澳洲等地。1405年之后的28年间，郑和七次奉旨率船队远航西洋，航线从西太平洋穿越印度洋，直达西亚和非洲东岸，途经30多个国家和地区。他的航行比哥伦布发现美洲大陆早87年，比达伽玛早92年，比麦哲伦早114年。在世界航海史上，他被开辟了贯通太平洋西部与印度洋等大洋的直达航线。600年前，从1405年开始，在28年间，郑和率领中国大明皇朝的200多艘船航行在世界海域上，造访各国。据英国著名历史学家-哈佛大学的李约瑟博士估计，1420年间中国明朝拥有的全部船舶，应不少于3800艘，超过当时欧洲船只的总和。今天的西方学者专家们也承认，对于当时的世界各国来说，郑和所率领的舰队，从规模到实力，都是无可比拟的。
郑和下西洋的目的：
主要是宣扬明朝国威，还有一说法是，明成祖为了寻找可能流亡海外的建文帝（军事目的）；
郑和下西洋的意义：
1.展示了明朝前期中国国力的强盛，中国的海军纵横大洋，虽然在国土面积上远远比元朝小，但至少实现了万国朝贡，盛世追迹汉唐；
2.加强了中国明朝政府与海外各国的联系，散财之举给南洋，西洋各国带来了经济实惠；
3.这是中国古代历史上最后一件世界性的盛举，从此，郑和之后，再无郑和。
4.由于郑和下西洋的政治目的大于经济目的，没有发动民间的商业贸易，全部的开支都依赖明朝强大的国力来支撑，没有对中国带来什么经济实惠，于是，明朝全盛时期过后，再也没有雄厚的经济实力来支持这项庞大的工程了，下西洋随之停止。
there are more and more history part can to do research, and also can learn that what is the influnce when zhen he come to malaya.
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